Giggles’ Dream?

How is this possible
How can this be
But here you are
Staring at me

I see your smile
I notice your laugh
I buckle over at your chubby cheeks
Two pigtails, eyes gleaming

I jump up from my sleep
Sleep?!
Ugh. It was, in fact
Just a dream

One night passes
Then another
And another
Back to sleep

Wait!
Same house
Same room
Same giggle or two

You didn’t leave?
What is happening to me?!
Then, you reach for me
How do you know me?

Then I sense the truth
Like an epiphany
It hits me
I wake again to ask

She belongs to me?
Barely a year old
My heart pounding noticeably
The future to be?

Tears of joyful hope flood over me
I will have a daughter?

-ecj

 

Usually, I write these poems and allow the readers to take away the obvious. Especially with the ones that are very direct in their message or story.

However, this time, I feel the need to jot some thoughts down and come back in the future to see if…I don’t know, something weird ended up happening.

Because these two dreams… more so the second time around, I felt like it was reality. When I woke up it took my mind longer than normal to come out of where I was. It was bizarre! I had conversations with my mom, my sister, etc. …all the while, the little baby girl was there. It was a lengthy dream the second go-around, as far as time.

And I’ve had identical dreams before, when I go back to the same place. But again, normally, the second time around I know, yeah, I’m dreaming. With this one…the second time felt like reality. So, when my alarm went off and she wasn’t sitting on my lap, I actually started to panic like where did my daughter go?! She was right here!

Oh my gosh…it was a horrible feeling! Reality check: I don’t have any children. Well, now that I think about it, coming into this year, I didn’t say anything out loud. I just thought, that would be great. Fall in love. Have a family. Son. Daughter. But it’s one of those things you just shrug off and keep living. Well, I did.

Then… How can I explain this? You see, my sister has four kids. Two boys, two girls. Practically all young adults now. Because I don’t have any children, I could never relate to how that feels to…you know, help bring new life into the world. So, in the dream, since I thought it was reality, all of a sudden I felt WoW!

Now that I’m awake, I can’t turn that feeling off. Absolutely incredible. But in my case, kind of unnecessary. I don’t know. I just live here, okay, I don’t always know what’s going on. But I’m asking God, like, what am I supposed to do with this happy, swirling feeling in my chest? Why does my heart rate spike just thinking about this dream?

(sigh) Speaking of which, I was supposed to go to sleep hours ago. How come I don’t write as well in the daytime? Perhaps, my brain is set to a different time zone. It has to be day somewhere around here lol! Another subject for another night.

What about you all? Any odd, eer…not-so-normal, too real dreams? Don’t let me suffer this alone. 🙂

-Eric

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Create a free website or blog at WordPress.com.
%d bloggers like this: